A friend and client called me yesterday about a problem he was having
and wanted my perspective.
In his telling of the problem, he called it a challenge, he mentioned how unhappy he was with his and another person’s attitude during a sales conversation.
I asked him what he was comparing that emotion of happiness to, to which there was a long pause.
I’ll call him John. John, after the pause, replied “I’m really asking for help here and I don’t appreciate you turning this back on me by getting philosophical.” To which I replied, “John, I’m asking this question so I can understand what’s causing your unhappiness because, right now, I don’t get it and if I don’t get it I can’t give you any advice.”
Our discussion continued for another 20 minutes or so discussing what he was comparing his unhappiness to and in the end, he had a different perception of the matter…his unhappiness.
Perception.
I used to believe “perception is reality.” But it’s not; perception is relative.
Your perception is relative to what you’re comparing it to.
I asked Cathy one time if she’d consider going to Russia on a missions trip and she emphatically said NO.
The conversation then went something link this….
“But what if you did?”
“I don’t.”
But what if you did?”
I don’t.”
We continued on through that for a few more minutes but I didn’t get anywhere with her. She’d been through this before and she knew that if she started thinking about what it would be like “if she did,” then her feelings could change!
Perception - is – RELATIVE.
What are you not wanting to do?
What if you did want to do it? How would that feel? What would you do?
How would it feel to do it?
To that end...
In his telling of the problem, he called it a challenge, he mentioned how unhappy he was with his and another person’s attitude during a sales conversation.
I asked him what he was comparing that emotion of happiness to, to which there was a long pause.
I’ll call him John. John, after the pause, replied “I’m really asking for help here and I don’t appreciate you turning this back on me by getting philosophical.” To which I replied, “John, I’m asking this question so I can understand what’s causing your unhappiness because, right now, I don’t get it and if I don’t get it I can’t give you any advice.”
Our discussion continued for another 20 minutes or so discussing what he was comparing his unhappiness to and in the end, he had a different perception of the matter…his unhappiness.
Perception.
I used to believe “perception is reality.” But it’s not; perception is relative.
Your perception is relative to what you’re comparing it to.
I asked Cathy one time if she’d consider going to Russia on a missions trip and she emphatically said NO.
The conversation then went something link this….
“But what if you did?”
“I don’t.”
But what if you did?”
I don’t.”
We continued on through that for a few more minutes but I didn’t get anywhere with her. She’d been through this before and she knew that if she started thinking about what it would be like “if she did,” then her feelings could change!
Perception - is – RELATIVE.
What are you not wanting to do?
What if you did want to do it? How would that feel? What would you do?
How would it feel to do it?
To that end...